For many women, using a sex toy for the first time can be both exciting and nerve-wracking. Questions like "What if I have no experience?" or "I tried using my fingers, but it hurt and didn't feel good—am I doing it wrong?" or "I tried my fingers, but it didn't hurt and didn't feel good. Can I try a toy instead?" are common. These concerns often stem from a lack of sexual experience or unfamiliarity with using toys. It's clear that both physically and mentally, this can be a challenging hurdle for beginners.
What to Do When Trying a Sex Toy for the First Time
1. Create a Good Atmosphere
You can't just jump right in. Finding something to arouse your desires is essential. You might watch some adult videos you enjoy or read erotic literature. This helps your body get into the "I am ready" mindset. If you get wet, great; if not, just getting in the mood is good too.
2. Use Sexy Accessories Wisely
Prepare a menstrual pad or bath towel to lay on the bed, keep tissues or wet wipes within reach, and make sure both your toy and hands are clean before starting.
Also, choose a lubricant—I prefer a lightweight one that's easy to apply and provides good lubrication.
Four-Step Guide
Now, it's time for foreplay. Here's my "four-step" technique to share with you:
Step 1
Lie down with your legs apart. Apply lubricant and gently caress your vulva, making sure to cover every area. When you reach the vaginal opening, start circling and gently rubbing it, gradually trying to enter as if you're making it "open its mouth." It's okay to make larger circles; vaginal muscles are very stretchy.
Note: Try to enter along the seam of the labia minora and slide in slowly against the upper inner wall of the vaginal opening. For me, this makes entry much easier and less painful. Hard insertion or pulling downward can cause discomfort!
As you gradually go deeper, let the lubricant seep into your body. Then, dip your middle finger in more lubricant and slowly move it in and out of the vagina.
Step 2
Once inside, you'll feel a full, enveloping sensation, like something is gently holding onto your finger. This feeling is truly amazing! At this point, you can move around a bit inside the vagina, circling and pressing upward against the inner wall. I really enjoy the pressing motion; doing this several times helps the inner wall relax and expand.
You can also explore forward. Bring in more lubricant with your finger in small amounts, ensuring thorough lubrication. While lubricating, I felt a soft, round area, which I suspect is the cervix. Massaging the indented areas on either side or just below it with more pressure is my sensitive spot; when a penis hits it, it feels incredible!
Tip: The distance from the vaginal opening to the cervix varies from person to person, as do sensitive spots. Once fully aroused, the vagina becomes very stretchy, so these are just general references.
